Do you ever have things that you hear about that just makes you so sad, you want to yell at the top of your lungs, “This isn’t right!”
When I hear parents complain about their older child with Reactive Attachment Disorder, I just want to cry. I know these children are exceedingly tough to raise, but I cannot figure out why the parents think their child will never change.
The parents say they do not want another family to suffer what they have suffered. I know life is tough living with a RAD kid, but the child has the possibility of making tremendous strides once in a different home. These children can and do change when in another home environment. It’s a proven fact!
I know I won’t be believed because I’m just a mother of a really mixed-up RAD child. I do believe in verifiable research though. The Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption did a 5-year research in 2017 looking at the success rate of older children from foster care placed in a new home.
That research proved that older children with behavioral and mental issues did change significantly when placed in a permanent family. The information is on the foundation webpage.
Please, please parents of RAD kids, know that it’s not wrong to place your children in a different home. It’s a way of showing love for your child. Letting go of something you’ve put so many years into, is very difficult, I know it.
I also know that seeing your child go to prison, because they never changed when living with you, is very painful. My child has been there for 23 years.
I’m trying to change the dynamics that happens to children left to fend for themselves after living in residential treatment facilities (RTF) or foster care when they turn 18 and no support system to help them succeed.
Information is POWER. It’s as simple as that. I’ve always felt that my daughter with RAD behaviors would have done much better in a traditional family. The experience of parenting my child has made me a child advocate for all children just like her.
Parents that have been so beat up by their children’s behaviors have trouble believing there is hope for their children. There is!
If you want more information, please email me at email@example.com
Thanks for reading. N. Ann Lamphere, MSW