This is the first of a blog series on my thoughts and feelings about RAD and its effects on all people involved with a RAD child. The posts may include questions or statements that I hear about from people and groups from my Facebook page. My idea is to give the quote and then give my 2-cent answer or comment.
#1. “Trauma really should be a specialty, like a Cardiologist, because it doesn’t respond to the traditional psychodynamics and cognitive behavioral therapies that most of us are trained for. – Janina Fisher (author).
There were many respondents to this statement. All of them positive for a “Trauma” trained therapist.
I earned my BS and MSW degrees after my daughter left. It’s taken a long time for me to come out to the world as a parent of a RAD child and a survivor of PTSD. Now, I’m getting more passionate to educate the world about RAD.
#2. How many people are affected by a RAD child?
If we have some idea or some estimate of how many people this problem effects, maybe that could help get more info out to the general public. I’m a glass half full kind of person and I believe the more people know the better understanding people can have and possibly more teaching available. (Adoptive parent)
The problem with getting the word out is that all of us parents are so beat up emotionally that it’s all we can do is survive. My life with my RAD daughter was so traumatic to me, it’s taken years to be the advocate I’ve become. I’m on a crusade to inform anyone who has ears to hear what early childhood trauma has done to children when they are too young to protect themselves. I keep hoping to find someone who is well-known to the world that will help us get the word out. Let’s keep pushing!
#3. We have a friend who wants to adopt our RAD child? What should we do?
We were pressured by several people to just let them help us find a family, because there were so many families they knew, who still wanted to adopt, but could not afford going to another country and didn’t trust the foster care system. One of those people tricked us into thinking they would work with an attorney to adopt him, and dragged out their feet for a year and four months. (We were on to them earlier than that.) We believe they never intended to adopt him. It’s always good to check out the legal requirements before placing a child with having professionals involved. (Adoptive parent)
Always, always check with an attorney or an agency specializing in adoptions to be sure all legalities are followed. These issues include a home study completed by a licensed social worker, have police background checks completed, and the Interstate Compact on the Placement of children (ICPC) needs to completed if the child is being placed in another state.
If you have a question you’d like answered and it would help more adoptive parents with RAD, please email me at firstname.lastname@example.org and I’ll answer it personally and then will add it to my next Ramblings on RAD to help inform any of my readers.
Thanks for reading,
N. Ann Lamphere